Rebuilding a Relationship after Your Partner Gets Clean and Sober

The person with the substance abuse disorder has become dependent and unreliable while the other is the super fixer. Does your partner acknowledge their addiction, and are they actively seeking help and recovery? Look for signs of genuine commitment, such as attending therapy, participating in support groups, and making lifestyle changes. Marriage is a union between two people that involves a strong emotional connection, commitment, and a shared life together.

I’d bet nine out of 10 of us won’t even answer, and we’ll just laugh because it’s such a ridiculous question. Sobriety doesn’t necessarily turn you into Liz Lemon, but it can give you the clarity to understand that you’ve been Liz Lemon your whole life. It’s part of the sobriety package, and it’s not necessarily a bad thing. Sobriety can be an incredible way to shed relationships you’ve outgrown as well as find new ones that align with your new values.

Have realistic expectations

Studies show that a healthy support system is a significant factor in an individual’s success in recovery and lowers the risk of relapse. Even just one supportive person for a recovering alcoholic is enough to boost them towards living a sober life. At Casa Palmera, our goal is to aid you in a comprehensive spiritual, physical, and emotional recovery. We offer treatment for chemical dependencies such as cocaine addiction, drug addiction and alcoholism. It is extremely important to us that you receive the highest quality medical care from our qualified staff during your stay.

• Is your spouse ready to go into recovery but doesn’t know where to begin?
• Use “I” statements to convey your feelings without sounding accusatory.
• This is the well-known stage theory of marriage in which change occurs developmentally in qualitatively different phases that occur with the time in the marriage.

If you need guidance from an impartial professional, contact a qualified therapist. No one wants to feel like an errant, irresponsible child. Nagging creates distance between a couple and promotes lack https://ecosoberhouse.com/ of trust and negative energy. When you know it is creating problems rather than solving them, you need to try a different strategy. Both will have to learn how to speak to each other all over again.

Try to stop enabling behaviors

When I finally walked away from booze at 34, my life opened up. I can honestly say sobriety is the best thing I have ever done for myself. It was my jumping-off point into a life I knew I had buried inside of me. I got out of debt, started a company that provides digital recovery, launched a podcast, and am in the middle of writing a book.

• Trust becomes a major issue, and it can be difficult to feel like you have a partner you can rely on.
• Practice this skillset on all the issues you listed in step 1.
• Below, I will discuss seven damaging behaviors that can dramatically impact your relationship.
• The positive effects were attributed to focusing on positive emotions, adapting to challenges, and recognizing strengths.
• These days, unless I’m feeling generous, I simply say, “I don’t drink,” and leave it at that.

Join our newsletter to be part of a community of people with shared experiences. This is a great asset to those struggling with their own personal battles. Our quarterly newsletter reminds you that others have gone down marriage changes after sobriety this path and can provide valuable support. No matter where on your journey – considering sobriety, living sober for years or months already – our newsletter is here as a guide with helpful resources, events, and more.

Holistic Therapy

Just as you need help overcoming the chains of addiction, the marriage trauma after substance abuse should be addressed with professional assistance. A few months after deciding to get sober, your partner may feel more calm and relaxed. After a year of sobriety, celebrate this milestone and be proud of your loved one’s progress. All these days, checking in regularly extensively impacts your sober partner’s success.

I call collaborative decision-making the “win-win waltz.” Win-win decision-making aims for a plan of action that pleases you both. What transitions couples from desperation about their difficulties to delight in sharing their lives together? Here’s the 8-step pathway along which I guide my therapy clients—and which you are welcome to take as well.

Recovery Treatment Available at Gateway

There are exceptions to this, like if someone alludes to their own struggle with alcohol, and then I might offer up a bit more of my personal experience. So we come to accept that going back is not an option and that building new relationships with new boundaries and clear expectations is key. Recovery is a process of transformation in which we seek to become something greater, healthier, and happier than we’ve ever been. Unfortunately, for as many years as it has taken folks to get into recovery, they’d like to make up for lost time and be all better by next week.